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Post by Tony(MoCity) on May 29, 2011 12:39:12 GMT -6
So a man walked into a convenient store, went up to the counter and asked for a box of condoms, while checking out the clerk asked would u like a bag for that, the man looked at him and said, na she's not that ugly...
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Post by plankton on May 29, 2011 16:21:39 GMT -6
Lol, how do you keep Helen Keller quiet?..... Put mittens on her!
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Post by mouse on May 29, 2011 18:04:04 GMT -6
What did one gay horse say to the other gay horse? HAAYYYY!
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Post by tye on May 29, 2011 20:27:13 GMT -6
What are yall like 8 lol
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Post by mouse on May 29, 2011 22:26:46 GMT -6
Aww.cmon Tye you know you got jokes. Lol
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Post by Tony(MoCity) on May 30, 2011 1:20:46 GMT -6
Yea tye it's kool, u can say a joke...lol...I think mine is the funniest so far...jus sayin...
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Post by ALF on May 30, 2011 9:55:18 GMT -6
[glow=red,2,300][/glow] What did one gray horse say to the other gray horse? HAAYYYY! Hahahaha wat!?!?!?! Gray horse!!!! A woman with no arms and no legs was crying on the beach when a man walked up to her and asked why are you crying?? She says well sir its embarrassing but I've never been fucked before so he picks her up takes her behind the rocks and fucks her. The next day she's back at the beach crying when a guy walks up to her and asks why are you crying?? She says I've never been fucked before so he takes her behind the rocks and fucks her. A week later the lady is back at the beach crying when a man walks up to her and asks why are you crying?? She says well sir I've never been fucked before so he picks her up walks toward the rocks then throws her in the ocean and yells now you're fucked!!!! |
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Post by solowma on May 30, 2011 9:59:50 GMT -6
I have heard that b4 hhhmmmmm
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Post by mouse on May 30, 2011 10:08:44 GMT -6
No FJ. Mine is definitely best. Just looses its impact when its read. I'll tell it at the meeting Saturday. Then you'll see
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Post by plankton on May 30, 2011 15:11:30 GMT -6
What's the diff between a kid with add and a dinosaur?
Idk you wanna go ride bikes?
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Post by MeMe on May 31, 2011 8:54:16 GMT -6
What did one gay horse say to the other gay horse? HAAYYYY! Def. my favorite so far!!! I seriously lol'd! |
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Post by MeMe on May 31, 2011 9:52:30 GMT -6
Translations for men
These translations are for all of you wonderful women out there, so that you will know what we really mean when we say...
"IT'S A GUY THING"
Translated:* "There is no rational thought pattern connected with it, and you have no chance at all of making it logical."
"CAN I HELP WITH DINNER?"
Translated:* "Why isn't it already on the table?"
"UH HUH," "SURE, HONEY," OR "YES, DEAR"
Translated:* Absolutely nothing. It's a conditioned response.
"IT WOULD TAKE TOO LONG TO EXPLAIN"
Translated:* "I have no idea how it works."
"TAKE A BREAK, HONEY. YOU'RE WORKING TOO HARD."
Translated:* "I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner."
"THAT'S INTERESTING, DEAR."
Translated:* "Are you still talking?"
"YOU KNOW HOW BAD MY MEMORY IS."
Translated:* "I remember the theme song to 'F Troop,' the address of the first girl I ever kissed and the vehicle identification numbers of every car
I've ever owned... but I forgot your birthday."
"OH, DON'T FUSS, I JUST CUT MYSELF. IT'S NO BIG DEAL."
Translated:* "I have actually severed a limb but will bleed to death before I admit that I'm hurt."
"HEY, I'VE GOT MY REASONS FOR WHAT I'M DOING."
Translated:* "And I sure hope I think of some pretty soon."
"I CAN'T FIND IT."
Translated:* "It didn't fall into my outstretched hands, so I'm completely clueless."
"WHAT DID I DO THIS TIME?"
Translated:* "What did you catch me at?"
"I'M NOT LOST. I KNOW EXACTLY WHERE WE ARE."
Translated:* "No one will ever see us alive again."
"WE SHARE THE HOUSEWORK."
Translated:* "I make the messes; she cleans them up."
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Post by plankton on May 31, 2011 12:13:12 GMT -6
How do you turn a fox into an elephant?
Marry It!
What is the difference between a battery and a woman?
A battery has a positive side.
Why is the space between a woman's breasts and her hips called a waist?
Because you could easily fit another pair of tits in there..
How do you make 5 pounds of fat look good?
Put a nipple on it.
Why do women fake orgasms ?
Because they think men care.
What do you say to a woman with 2 black eyes?
Nothing, she's been told twice already.
If your wife keeps coming out of the kitchen to nag at you, what have you done wrong?
Made her chain too long
Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?
Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you.
Why do women have smaller feet than men?
It's one of those 'evolutionary things' that allows them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.
Why do men pass gas more than women?
Because women can't shut up long enough to build up the required pressure.
If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first ?
The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.
Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's sex drive by 90%..
It's called a Wedding Cake.
Why do men die before their wives?
They want to.
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Post by MeMe on May 31, 2011 14:17:29 GMT -6
haha good ones!
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Post by ALF on May 31, 2011 18:01:11 GMT -6
A black priest and white priest were arguing one day after church. The black priest said Jesus is black. No said the white priest he's white. The two argues back and forth back and forth that they pushed each other in front of a bus and they died. While in heaven they waited at the gate for Jesus. The black priest still insisted Jesus was black and white priest still insisted Jesus was white when the gate opened and Jesus came out and said Buenos dias!!
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